Education

The closer my son edges towards starting school, the more the topic of education becomes a bugbear for me. What should it achieve? What do we risk with our choices of education? Where should the children be educated?

In many ways, our family's finances and geographical location dictate that public school is our only truly viable option. So the public/private question is not in view at the moment. The problem I have is one of trust. I love my children dearly, and do not wish to entrust them to a person or institution that will see them worse off rather than better.

I read with interest this article today, part of a speech given by the Head of The Kings School, Tim Hawkes. In a nutshell, he provided a list of 10 key skills that school curriculums are sadly missing. It is a very interesting read. The 10 skills he listed were:

1. Community - how to live in a real community, where you can't delete people who flame you
2. Communication - how to communicate effectively with other people
3. Know yourself - to make a decision about what you stand for, what you believe
4. Intimacy - In Hawkes' words: "It is not just smut and titillation that students want, for they can get these quite easily these days. What they want is something more elusive, something rare, and that is wholesome advice on how to be a man, how to be a woman."
5. Emotional Control - how to avoid killing someone when they get your back up
6. Finance - how to avoid living beyond your means
   
7. Practical things - like how to keep a house clean (I'm still refusing to be a good student on that one!)
8. Manners (isn't that a dirty word, these days?)
9. Responsibility. I love Hawkes' characterisation of "screenagers" - who spend their lives watching rather than living and taking responsibility. I don't know that it's limited to people under the age of 18, though...
10. Resilience - I think this is important, particularly as I see my toddler son become so easily discouraged by the smallest of obstacles. He needs to learn that life will not always be easy or trouble-free. He needs to learn how not to crumple in a heap when things don't go as planned.
    

While I didn't agree with everything he said, it was a good reminder to me that our family has an important job of preparing our kids for life in the real world. No matter which school we choose, we do not give up our job as parents. We still have an educational role to provide.

My temptation as a parent is to substitute presents for presence. I can be trapped by the notion that my children will be better off if I shower them with nice things, like the ridiculous $260 DKNY baby jeans I saw advertised on TV the other evening. But as the list shows, most of these skills are ones that I can help to encourage in my kids. The only way to do that is to spend real time with them.