Movies for the kiddies

As our eldest child grows up, we've started thinking about whether to take him to the movies yet, and what to see. It's not a huge choice - there are usually only one movie that would even remotely be suitable for a preschooler.

The issue we wrestle with at the moment is the opacity of the current ratings system. Sure, you have more info than we had as kids, but what on earth does "Mild violence" mean? Is it the kind of cartoon "bop on the head", or something that would give our son nightmares?

There is a solution. I found this great website called "Kids in Mind". It's a movie ratings site that specifically goes through and gives you detailed info on what the "mild violence" is. And it provides you with a three-point ratings system based on the levels of sex/violence/swearing in the movie.

Sometimes it seems to go overboard, but if you're the kind of parent that wants to know exactly what's in the movie before you go, then check it out. Then make up your own mind whether your little ones would enjoy it or not!

Personality, schmersonality

Today, I took one of those online Myers-Briggs tests. Once again, it seems that I've changed in my designation.

Apparently, I'm now an INTP, otherwise known as an "Engineer" or "Absent-Minded Professor"

What the - ?

Well, perhaps the Absent-minded bit isn't too far off the mark, but Engineer I definitely am not!


Now where did I leave my sunglasses...?

(If you want to see what the test said about me, check here)

Edit: OK, so I spent a little more time reading the profile, and while I still disagree with the term "Engineer", here's what the site summarised:

"INTPs are logical, individualistic, reserved, and very curious individuals. They focus on ideas, theories and the explanation of how things work. They are especially adept at discussions and debate. They have the ability to focus intently on a subject. They appreciate and respect intelligence in others."

I'd have to agree with that.

Frazzled

Some nights are just tough - particularly when I'm doing the dinner/bath/bed/storytime thing all by myself. Patience wears thin, and I find myself struggling to keep a civil tone as the kids go nuts (they're tired and crabby, too!).
Colin Buchanan's written a song for families to remember in times like this:

Press On, Mums

Press on, Mums
In all the chaos
Look to Jesus through the tears
Press on, Mums
God will guide you
Through those precious, tender years

Chorus
And in all you do do it for Jesus
Who won you life and free forgiveness
Yesterday, today
He is the same
All you do
Do it in Jesus' name

Press on, Dads
Love your wife
Serve your children
Set the pace
Press on Dads
Seize the moment
Show them Jesus
Run the race

Chorus

Press on, kids
God adores you
He will hear you when you pray
Press on, kids
Love your family
Honour, serve
Forgive, obey

Chorus

...and when all your human energy is gone
Look towards your Jesus and press on

Words and music by Colin Buchanan (c) 2007 Universal Music Publishing (Aust)

Those last two lines are what I need to remember on nights like this. Strength to love even when you're bone tired...

:)

Weathering

I can't tell you how wonderful it's been to have sunny Spring weather again. A month ago, we were all staggering around under the weight of scarves, beanies, heavy overcoats and 14 layers of clothing. Now, the sun has appeared and life is beautiful.

It wasn't until the sun came out that I realised how much the weather had been affecting our collective mood. When we were in the middle of a rainy, freezing winter, lots of things happened:

• People didn't go out as much, because the weather was bad. Constant life indoors makes you stir crazy.
  
• People who did go out noticed the absence of those who didn't. Emptier churches made you sad, and less inclined to go the next week.
  
• Cold, grey days made for cold, grey people. The depression levels in our community rose considerably.
  
• When people are cold and miserable, sometimes they assume that it's someone else's fault. Complaints rose considerably.
• If you're complained to on a regular basis, you tend to pass it on. If not, you just internalise it and wonder what's wrong with you.

I've known about SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) for some time now, but this is the most extreme demonstration of its existence I have yet had. My resolution for next winter is not to be discouraged about winter-negativity, but to try and understand. It's not them.
It's the rain.

Happy Fathers' Day!

Is it just me, or are celebratory days becoming less about celebration and more about buying expensive stuff?

Why does love have to be measured by the size/expense/complexity of the present you get for someone?

Just wondering. Once upon a time, Mothers' day used to consist of running out to pick some Chrysanthemums growing in the garden. Now we have to buy the present, the wrapping paper, the card, and the flowers or else we're just not quite cutting it as far as familial love goes.

Believe what???

Quick postscript to the new toddler bed (see post below):

It's one of those pink plastic ones (chosen for budgetary reasons rather than taste) with pictures of princesses on the headboard. We bought it out of a catalogue and it came in flatpack form, so it wasn't until we were constructing the thing that we discovered its little "slogan for life"...

Believe in your dreams...

So many problems with this. So many. For a start, the bed manufacturers' notion seemed to be tied up with "your dreams" = "swanning around in pretty coloured dresses with white petticoats", which was a problem for me to start with. The bigger issue, though, is that at my children's age, their "dreams" seem to = waking up screaming in terror at 2am. I don't know whether I want to encourage belief of that sort!

Signs of Growth

Funny how things change.

When we were new parents, eagerly watching our firstborn for signs of growth, we couldn't wait to see the next stage. "Ooh, look! He's walking!" "Aaaw, doesn't he look like a big boy in his new toddler bed." "Wow! Aren't you clever brushing your hair all by yourself!" It seemed that we were always anticipating, always encouraging, always watching for the next step.

I feel differently now.

Yesterday, we put our baby girl into a toddler bed for the first time. Yes, I was proud of her growing up. I was also relieved that she managed to sleep right through the night in it. But my overriding thought was "No! It's too soon! Where did my baby go?"

Yup. I'm Pathetic. Obviously I'm doomed to be one of those blubbery mothers who tearfully watches their kids at school events, embarrassing them horribly and scarring them for life.

Doing Nothing for Fun

Having a holiday was disastrous for my waistline, but it was great for everything else. Experiencing warm sunlight, getting toes sandy at the beach, actually finishing several books. The best result of the holidays, though, has been the discovery of the joy of unstructured time.

As parents, we're threatened with the devastation of having a child "behind in their development", as if there is some golden standard of excellence to which we can and must push our toddler. We're supposed to maximise their learning, so any play they have is to be educational, not just fun. Toys can't just exist, they have to have some teaching component to them (even if it's just ABC-123). Our children have great expectations thrust upon them: they have to expand their vocabulary, they should learn to count to 20 before preschool, they must learn their alphabet and how to read, and above all, they must, must, must BE CLEVER!

It's a big burden to place on a small child. It's also a heavy guilt-trip to lay on parents. And it really isn't necessary, because sometimes it's better just doing nothing.

We did a lot of nothing this holiday. Nothing, that is, except spending time with each other giving our full attention to the children, and letting them be themselves. No agendas. No pressure-cooker flash cards. No super-engineered educational toys. No "Sorry kids, I just have to..." Just us listening to them, interacting with them, and experiencing life together. And you know what? In two weeks our daughter's vocabulary expanded quite considerably. Our son can now ride without training wheels. Not because we forced these things to happen, but because we slowed down long enough to let our children be themselves.

It doesn't take much. Tonight, I delayed dinner by half an hour so that I could sit down and wrestle with the kids. It was only half an hour, but we were all giggling at the end. It also meant that I didn't have to say "Sorry, honey, Mummy just has to..."

I highly recommend doing Nothing. It's a great way to discover who your kids really are.

Back Again!

We're back. It's been a great time away, and the weather was lovely. We were even able to go swimmming!

I've been told previously that I'm the optimist in our family, so in trying to live up to that reputation I'm looking for positives in our return home...

• The rain is helping our vegies to grow
• The cold helps us to appreciate our central heating all the more
• We're back to work, so I'll be able to get back to SRE and KFJs in the next couple of days
• I can log back in to Facebook again
• We get the dogs back this afternoon
  
• Um...

Can I go back on holidays now? ;)

Holiday time

Two sleeps until our family holiday. I am feeling mixed emotions about the whole thing:

• Excited - we've been feeling very run-down, so a rest is in order.
• Guilty - our jobs involve term-time teaching and other responsibilities. I'm feeling guilty at leaving those responsibilities mid-stream.
• Thankful - our two-week flu seems to be settling down now, so I'm grateful that we won't be travelling with an illness cloud over our heads.
• Stressed - I wrote down a list of things that I needed to pack for the kids. It took up two A4 pages. I know I'm going to forget something.
  
• Anticipation - we're going to catch up with my Grandmother while we're away, which is both a responsibility and a blessing.

We'll be away for two weeks, so this blog will be silent for the duration. See you when we get back!